Film: Darryl’s Hard Liquor and Porn Film Festival

DARRYL’S HARD LIQUOR AND PORN FILM FESTIVAL

Possible Worlds Canadian Film Festival

21st, and 23rd August, Bobbi’s Pole Dancing Studio

Ladies and gentlemen, if you think this sounds suspicious, wait till I tell you I took my mum. That’s right folks, not nearly as dangerous as you thought, hey? Right. Yet I still feel some of you are doubting me.

After a screening on Friday night that played to a packed house, I was lucky enough to scrounge some tickets for the second screening of the best of the last five years of Darryl’s Hard Liquor and Porn Film Festival. Screening annually in Toronto, this year the festival will celebrate its tenth birthday, which, may I remind you, adds up to a considerable amount of smut. The man must know his stuff.

Presented in conjunction with the 2009 Possible Worlds Canadian Film Festival, Mr. Sex himself (known also as Darryl Gold) was flown out especially to tease, tickle and delight the audience with a selection of adult-themed but entirely hilarious short films. In addition to divulging his expertise on the birds and the bees, he also illustrated it’s not only us primates doing the dirty these days – but Lego men, paper men (‘origasmis’ all round!) as well as the worrying coupling of Secretary Barbie and M.J. (apparently they didn’t get the news cast). In short, all those childhood toys have a secret life of their own once you turn the lights off.

However, for every film exploring more explicit (but not that explicit- this is not a film festival of adult content but of more general sex related goodness), there were just as many littered with poo and wee and bum jokes – which proved in the end, to be just as much a crowd pleaser. Commonly, I wouldn’t consider any of these to come strictly under the category of either porn or hard liquor, though the former is definitely debatable, depending on what circles you travel in.

One of my favourites of the night was a mockumentary style biography of the life and photographic means of Victor Arsenovich (1880 – 1923). An unfortunate soul, with little enough money to buy a cardboard box and a pin for early camera construction, Victor made use of a similarly structured body part – a dark internal, and a small, tight opening for means of capturing an image on film. You only need reread his surname to take a stab at that one. This one’s worth a gander if only for the final moments, in which he shot a fortuitous self-portrait – developed post-mortem by interested parties.

Did I mention that the whole thing took place in a pole studio? Take a wild guess at what some of the perks may have been.

The venue was actually a little smaller than I’d expected, and a lot less dingy. If you like pink, this’d probably make your top 5 favourite places, and there was plenty of kitsch, glitz and glamour to go round. The venue, the crowd and the set-up of the night made for a strange, if quirky atmosphere. If a strip club and a chai tent were to have babies, this’d probably be what they looked like. Nevertheless, whatever vibe the organisers were channelling, seemed to work just fine for the occasion.In a way that gave me warm and fuzzies, the films were projected onto a white sheet screen that was probably only stapled to the ceiling for the night.

The Hard Liquor and Porn films were book ended on the one end with specially commissioned Kino shorts, and on the other with guest DJs, which made the already great night, even better. The official proceedings were cap-ended by a bare-chested, body mover in an oversized champagne glass – with men gaping and women planning their first lesson. At least I know was.

You will love this if: you’ve never watched porn with a room full of strangers, and I’m expecting most of us haven’t.

You will hate this if: you’re a prude or a virgin (wait no you will love it!)

Possible Worlds Canadian Film Festival ran until the 26th August.  For the full program and to find out more visit: http://www.possibleworlds.net.au/

For more information on Darryl’s Hard Liquor and Port Film Festival visit: http://hardliquorandporn.com/ (If you’re like me, and try accessing this site from your university domain, you will be denied.)

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