Metallica Reportedly Losing Money Due To "Disastrous" Missteps

Metallica are not just the world’s most successful metal band, but one of the biggest selling bands of all time, period. But now the thrash juggernauts are reportedly being dogged by creeping debt.

In a new interview with literary website The Weeklings, Metallica biographers Paul Brannigan and Ian Winwood have revealed that the band’s finances are in the red.

And they’re apparently losing money fast, due to “disastrous decisions” and misguided vanity projects, such as 2013’s basically unwatchable 3D feature film, Through The Never.

The pair’s assertion reads:

“Since 2010 it’s likely that Metallica have lost more money than they’ve made.

“By their own admission, the two stagings of the Orion festival were disastrous financially, and the shambles that was the ‘Through the Never’ movie cost $32 million and will only recoup a fraction of that amount.

“Factor in HQ staff salaries, crew retainers and assorted running costs associated with maintaining an entertainment corporation and you can easily understand why the band – of necessity now rather than by choice – are driven to tour Europe every summer.

“‘Through the Never’ film project was a horrible misjudgment, a misguided attempt to breathe new life into a decade-old idea. As the film spiralled horribly over-budget it’s hard not to imagine that at least one band member – and let’s be honest, we’re talking about James Hetfield here – thinking ‘What the f–k have we got ourselves into?’ Quite how that ‘script’ ever got the green light is an unfathomable mystery.”

Still, it’s probably unlikely that we’ll see Lars Ulrich busking on the streets outside his California mansion anytime soon (let’s face it, the quality of street drummers these days is so high, he’d probably be sent packing faster than you can say “St. Anger snare”).

Metallica are currently holed away in the studio, working on their long-awaited follow-up to 2008’s Death Magnetic. They also have several upcoming gigs scheduled, including a headlining slot at Rock in Rio USA and a string of European tour dates over the Aussie winter. Who knows? We may even see them again at Soundwave 2016?

But for now, we’re going to amuse ourselves with the thought of one of the richest bands in the world utilising shop-a-dockets and having mac & cheese for dinner this week to pinch some extra pennies, just like the rest of us.

Check out a few hilarious broke Metallica puns (that we totally stole from Reddit) that ought to supply you with your daily requirement of LOLs, below.

Gallery: Soundwave 2013 @ RNA Showgrounds, Brisbane / Photos by Barry Schipplock

Debt Magnetic

Bill ‘Em All

The Accountant That Failed

Loan

Re-Loan

Am I Broke? (Yes I am)

Harvester of Borrow

Garage Sale Inc.

One (Dollar)

Fuel (I Can’t Afford Any)

The Poor Horsemen

The Four Brokemen

The Pay That Never Comes

Hit the lights(oh the power’s out)

The Mortgage Remains

Default, Inc.

Trapped Under Debt

Napster of Puppets

Disposable Plates and Cups

Unforgiven Debt

The House That Jack Lost

…And Bankruptcy For All

Trapped Eating Rice

Ride The Bus

Disposable Income

For Whom The Bill Tolls

No Whiskey In The Jar