Nile Rodgers And Keith Urban Are Making EDM-Country Music, God Help Us All

Well guys, it’s been fun. We’ve had a fairly good couple of thousand years enjoying the multifaceted concept that is ‘music’, but unfortunately we’re going to have to pull stumps on the whole shebang, because Nile Rodgers and Keith Urban are working together to create, what they’re calling, ‘EDM-Country’.

In what can only result in the worst aural experience since Rebecca Black’s Friday, Rodgers and Urban have been making their nightmarish frankenstein music in the studio recently, with Nile telling RAM Country that they’ve got a couple of rough tracks finished which, wait for it, combine his own signature guitar lines “playing over some frenetic banjo playing by Urban, and set to a pulsating club beat.”

Possibly aware of the hideous monster he is assiting to birth into a world unprepared for such bastardry, Rodgers tells the RAM reporter he is expecting some backlash, saying “His fans may have some kind of problem at first. But my biggest records have always been like that.”

“A lot of people, the only record they ever bought by David Bowie was Let’s Dance. That’s at least [seven] million albums. So his fanbase got angry: ‘This sucks! This is not Ziggy Stardust! That’s not Scary Monsters!’ But it was huge because it spoke to a broader audience. I think a record like this will speak to a broader audience, and the country people will come around.”

The music is supposedly set to be released by Urban in his next album, irrevocably ruining music for all of mankind, forever. RIP.

Let’s remember the simpler times before Nile Rodgers helped doom us all, shall we?

Listen: Daft Punk – Get Lucky (Ft. Nile Rodgers)

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