Gig Reviews

Star Wars Burlesque – The Empire Strips Off, The Vanguard – 25/11/2011

For those who like burlesque and for those who like/worship Star Wars – this was a winning combination, for this was no tacky Star Wars rip-off with gratuitous nudity, but a professional night of burlesque – with a Star Wars flavoured twist. The warm-act of 2 cheeky go-go girls (complete with Princess Leia bread-bun style hair-do’s) built the anticipation amongst the crowd – especially the nerdier fans in attendance. And tonight featured MC Luke Skywalker, who provided more than a few laughs between performances, and who was looking much tubbier than he did in those movies a long, long time ago.

First up on tonight’s bill of deliciously saucy ladies was a Hoth girl accompanied by a dead Taunton (what, you don’t know what a Taunton is?). The pulsating rhythms and gyrating dancing was a fine energizer to prepare the crowd for what was to come. Following up with a sensual Jedi girl dulled the mood somewhat, but it’s unlikely it dulled the excitement in the pants of the gents in attendance. This was followed up by a trio of Wookie hunters – a specifically created tribe of women that is not a part of Star Wars lore; they wore gutted Wookie heads as head pieces and Wookie fur bikini’s. Their costume and corresponding chorography was one of the early highlights of the evening, and there were no doubt a few disturbing and arousing dreams that night. Following up with an exceptionally beautiful Twi’lek girl and every fanboys dream, Jabba’s slave wrapped up the first act – both routines were the strongest so far and had us all feeling the force.

After a brief break with the go-go girls, it was time for act 2 – and Boba Fett, whose sweet and slick moves had many standing to attention. Luke Skywalker followed up with an outstanding cover of Radiohead’s Creep (after lamenting his perverted crush on his sister Princess Leia) which was an eye-opener. The force was strong in this one! And following this up with a crotch-grabbing Tuscan raider and alluring Emperor’s elite guard had even the bravest Jedi swooning. But the highlight of the night was no doubt the trio of sexed-up Stormtroopers, as they melted the steeliest of hearts with a high energy routine that had us all reaching for our lightsabers. To top it off, the final act was none other than a very vampy Darth Vader – in extra light black, accentuating every single curve as she grooved around the stage.

As far as Star Wars parodies go, this was a most saucy caricature – the bawdy nature of burlesque makes a perfect match for the pop culture icon that is the world of Star Wars.

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