TISM Frontman Says He’ll Perform At Eurovision, For A Price

TISM frontman Humphrey B. Flaubert (real name Damian Cowell) has responded positively to the increasingly popular petition to get TISM to reform and represent Australia at Eurovision 2015, which Australia will now compete in.

“I do not wish to comment on behalf of TISM out of respect for my colleagues and the artistic integrity of the band,” says Cowell in a statement released this morning. “However if a multi-national with a horrendous human rights record gives me a large cheque, all bets are on.”

Aside from his bandmates and wealthy multi-nationals, the other thing stopping TISM from fully reforming for Eurovision is the competition rule which says a maximum of six performers are allowed on stage at any one time; TISM had seven members. Maybe one of them could just sing along from somewhere amongst the crowd for an extra-dramatic breaking-the-fourth-wall effect.

Luckily, Cowell already has a social avenue to exploit to increase TISM’s chances of performing at Eurovision — he recently released an album titled Damian Cowell’s Disco Machine, which features commentary from Eurovision hosts Julia Zemiro and Sam Pang. What a coincidence!

The album also features the likes of Shaun Micallef, Tim Rogers, Kate Miller-Heidke, Kathy Lette, Tony Martin and John Safran. Cowell and some of his album collaborators will be appearing live on stage in Melbourne, Brisbane and Sydney this month.

The petition to reform TISM for Eurovision has almost 9,000 signatures at the time of writing.

Watch: TISM – Whatareya? (You’re A Yob or You’re A Wanker)

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